I was up and emailing clients by Ten. Woo! Dad made breakfast, too. That was great.

He and I went to the auto parts store and purchased a tire patch kit, and various other gadgets we’d need to plug my tire. . . Spent a couple hours with him total- doing odds and ends with the car . .and I also bought him some Hazelnut Iced coffee at Dunkin’ Donuts.

Spent the rest of the day between the car, good conversations, and a few IM sessions with friends. Chris <3 and I had a really great text message exchange today, too. I’ll be seeing him SOOOON!!!!! (Less than 48 hours!)

Just a quick note re: my car. I purchased it from my sister in August of 2006– a little over a year ago. While cleaning it out today, I removed her stuff. What does this mean? For the first time in one year– I have the energy to be mostly “normal”. I cleaned out my car. . . and I’m not in the hospital with excruciating pain tonight. This is definitely a victory. I had the energy! I am so happy.

I didn’t go on my walk tonight– as I really busted ass with my car and spent most of the day on my feet. I’m content with today. Tonight, I’ll snuggle into my plaid wonderland with a smile on my face and a tiny whisper . . . “Well done.”

Blogged with Flock

Last night . . something I really needed happened. I won’t dig too deeply, here, as writing would barely scratch the surface.

I finally had closure with my ex.

I never could quantify what precipitated my breakup with David, and it bugged me. Would I make the same inconspicuous mistake again? What if I run off this beautiful, amazing guy (Chris), too? Am I cursed with some form of relationship-screwing secret powers?

Nope! I’m fine. Great, in fact (according to David). He and I were always better friends than anything else, and I’m quite thankful that our friendship is genuinely restored.

Quick note- Facebook users– This is an imported note . .meaning . . It’s streamed from my real blog. Somebody believed I was writing articles about Chris that he couldn’t see . . because he doesn’t have a facebook acct. To the contrary, this is published on my public blog for the world to see. (Hello, world!)

I’ve been going on nightly walks, and I really appreciate the friends keeping me company via phone; Specifically Anthony, Kyle, and Jason. . . and of course, Chris. He’s been cheering me on about it and promises to join me when I’d like the company.

I’ll be leaving for Melbourne on after a doctor visit on Wednesday. They’re drawing blood to see where my iron levels are. Woo! Soon- I’ll be receiving treatment!

Blogged with Flock

Tags: funny, relationships, facebook, friends, exercise, health

Embedded Video

Life is constantly unfolding.  In RENT, friends who thought they’d be together forever split ways.

I recently became a boyfriend.

Another friend recently became single.

I’m feeling healthier than I have in a long time.  Another friend is about to undergo a liver biopsy.

Yet, as healthy as I feel . . I’m still going to die without proper treatment. . . Change Change Change.

Is it good?  Is it bad?  Why waste time on silly judgments?  Life just IS. . . so make the most of it.  Live for today.  By doing your best to make today worthwhile, you’ll be improving your life, and the lives of those who come along after you’re pwned by the good lord.

Blogged with Flock

Tags: Rent, dating, life

For the first time, in a LOOOONG time, I can say my life is on the mend. I finally became sick and poor enough to qualify for charity. While it isn’t the most dignified way of not dying . . . help equals NOT DYING. I heart life, so I’ll do anything reasonable to keep mine. Plus, I want to outlive the few uncle-fuckers who wish me dead, because I refuse to give them the pleasure of coming to my funeral. *SCRATCH* Meow!

The charity is Christian-based and the people there are VERY friendly with the exception of the chaplain who hates Unity. I pwn him regularly in theological discussions, though, so It’s actually quite fun.

Stop. Did you notice something? I’m well enough to be spicy again. Not a bitch, just not a push-over or ghost. Even if you and I don’t know each other, you should probably stop and celebrate that fact. I have ENERGY again. Also, free drugs. . . Drugs which lower my blood sugar . . and almost killed me today. I’ll tell you why in a bit, I promise.

I’m no where near my healthiest, but I am sincerely thankful that I am NO WHERE near my my weakest, either. . . And I’m just going to continue to improve. I’m feeling like little Mario after eating the super mushroom. It’s like hugs from Jesus.

To top it all off, I’m in love.

After the failures I’ve experienced- I’m hesitant to introduce any new guys to you, my friends. I mean, I was JUST talking about Tai in the last entry. What makes this new guy so different?

Everything.

I’m not one given over to frivolous emotion. I’m not one to just DIVE into a pool without knowing its temperature, and likely, I’ve researched the effects of chlorinated water on my dry skin before tip-toeing in.

I swear to God I am NOT dain bramaged. This guy is positively amazing. If you haven’t tried OkCupid and you are even REMOTELY interested in finding a person . . Just sign up already.

According to OkCupid, Chris was my

76% Match, 83% Friend, 5% Enemy

That’s their emphasis, btw. I’m not that cheesy.

He finishes my sentences and knows the punchlines to all my silly jokes. . . Friggin’ scary . . . and amazing.

I mean, you guys will have to deal with two sarcastic queers, but we’re both so darn personable, you can’t help but love us. Woot. As silly as this seems . . . I can honestly say I love him.

We’ve had more fun than I could have ever imagined, and part of than fun involves hickeys. Hickeys mean exercise which lowers blood sugar. Blood sugar reducing medication, ummm . . . Obviously reduces blood sugar.

Today, I got up with Chris (Yep, I’m in Palm Bay aka Melbourne with him) had a little breakfast, got sleepy and laid down.

If it wasn’t a zillion degrees in here, and a loud crashing noise outside . . that could have been a permanent nap. . .

I tested my blood sugar this morning (without washing my hands first. tsk tsk) and it was unusually high. I took my medicine, ate the little snacky breakfast . . got tired and laid down . .

I really SHOULD have washed my hands. Either that, or my blood sugar dropped nearly 200 points in two hours. I went from 240-something to “LOW” on the glucometer. LOW = Below 70. I know the symptoms of low blood sugar, so I immediately made two casedeas, ate a box of pockey, and drank some milk. I could BARELY walk. I was dizzy. I was shaking inside, and I could barely see.

A little while after eating, the symptoms stopped.

I’m still feeling ill, but MUCH better than before.

Now, enjoy those pictures. (Yesh, they are hickeys. Neither of us have birth marks . . we’re just having a great time. )

See pics now. <3 Josh

(For those of you unfamiliar with the Internet, click the pic for a larger image. Looking at tiny pictures is bad for your eyes. Also, your Mom asked me to remind you not to sit so close to the screen- You’ll rot your brain. Oh, and call her. She misses you :-p)

<== It’s a hickey butterfly! Very rare!

<3 <3 <3

My advice?  Get off your ass and earn real life XP.

Not that I don’t play video games, I’ve just learned not to obsess.  Instead, I focus my energies on REAL Life.

I’m constantly amazed by the good springing forth in my life lately.  It all began with The Secret (Extended Edition) I can’t say enough good stuff about it.  My local friends should set a time to come over and watch it, because it’s really amazing stuff.

I’m doing things I’ve wanted to for so long, and suddenly — It’s manifesting.

I went shopping with Thor  on Wednesday afternoon, and had such a GREAT time.  We went to the big mall at Millinea (sp) and the outlet stores next to Mary Queen of the Universe church.  Next, we got lost.

An hour and a half later (10:30 pm or so) we were at Kobe Japanese Steakhouse on International Drive.  That night, neither of us stuck to our diets.  Sake + Sushi + Shrimp + Scallops = Sin.  Good sin.  Yummy, tasty, delicious, SIN!

I still lost two pounds!  So there.  It goes to show what cutting out extra snacks and crap will do for ya . . . You get to eat like a starving person once per week.

Friday, I met up with a really nice guy named  Noah. That led to hanging out with 13 new friends at Mugs & Movies to see The Number 23 starring Jim Carrey.   While I wasn’t really impressed by the movie, I was really impressed that such a great group of people existed in Sebring.  Noah’s a super-cool guy and I’m looking forward to the fun and nerdy stuff we’ll do.

I also bought lots of weight-loss stuff and became a gold card member at GNC.  The people there are so cool.  I can’t believe I felt intimidated walking past that place.  They told me they really eat cheeseburgers in the back room.  I fell in love instantly.

Other News: 

• I’m naming my bed “the gym.”
• I’m down to 265 pounds from an all-time high of 315 about a year ago.
• Thor has a MySpace
• My Grandpa’s 75th birthday surprise party today– He was shocked.
• I’ll be in Tampa with my sister tomorrow. (Today if you want to be technical.)
• I’ll be helping her friends purchase a computer, and setting it up for them like a good person.  Then my sister will feed me.
• I drink slime at least once per day.
• I also consume a good deal of caffeine.
• I like bulleted text.
• So I’ll type . . .
• Just a few more lines . . .
• To get my fix.

I had a great talk with Mike last night.  He’s a good friend, and I’m so glad we met. 

Magic is everywhere, and so . . I live for today, and I’m happier than I’ve been in a long time.

(((Bear Hugs)))  Until next time.  Take care of yourself, okay?

On the soul level, I’ve been feeling a tad depressed, but I’m reading The Re-enchantment of Everyday Life

It’s one of the most soulful, healing, and encouraging books I’ve read. Thomas Moore weaves a web of soulful stories; encouraging readers to re-enchant every day life and believe in “magic.”

If you’re looking for a good Christmas gift to share with a friend- especially one going through a tough time, this book comes with my blessing.

It’s cooling down here. The weather guy said to expect a “seasonal” Thanksgiving. I’m very excited to be spending with David and friends, but I’m missing my family– Nothing beats Mom’s Thanksgiving.

Love to all,

Josh

This link is why I want my doctor’s office to get off its ass.

I know that only my friends read my blog . .but . . just in case there’s a non-friend in our midsts:
If you’ve ever given me shit because I didn’t have the strength to do something for you– fuck off.

And she’s right. It does feel good to know you’re not crazy. Now if I could just convince my doctor to learn more about treating me, I’d be really happy.

If not, I’ll have to move on.

Josh

Interesting . . .

Yep- lots of iron in her heart. Yikes.

It was complicated with other issues, and I lost interest in the show.  Haha

I can’t describe it any other way.

Those following my blog will remember I have recently been diagnosed with low testosterone. Today was my first shot of Depotest – an anabolic steroid. If I were to sit here and describe the differences in my body compared to 24-hours ago, this would be my longest blog entry yet. My Doctor is a genius!

Within an hour of the shot, my voice deepened some, and my muscles began losing some of their inflammation. I laid down for a nap, and woke up, and I’m so amazed by how I feel, I keep pinching myself to verify it’s real.

It’s real. My roomie and I go on walks a couple times a week. Tonight, I followed our path, swung my arms the whole way, walked at an almost-jogging pace, and (because I was walking fast) finished in about 70% of our normal time.

I didn’t stop for a break ONCE. I had gotten so bad lately, that I was stopping for at least three breaks. Jeeeeeeesh . . One day . . . Just one day’s time did all of this . .

I’m not one to advocate the use of medication to treat problems, but this time, I was fucking wrong. It truly is MY miracle drug.

Low testosterone, in my case, was caused by Hemochromatosis (too much iron in my blood). I have pretty little iron filings in my brain- plugging up my pituitary gland, the one responsible for signaling the creation of Testosterone.

Until we can get the lil’ Iron filings out of my brain, I’ll count my lucky stars (and syringes!)

Peace.